I believe everyone experiences a crisis of faith at some stage – or if you are like me, many little crises of faith and one or two big ones.
On plenty of occasions I’ve asked questions like “What are you up to God?” Or “Where are You, Father?”, or “Why isn’t my prayer answered?” … and many more. These questions come when life doesn’t make sense, our own understanding of God is still maturing, we’re disappointed because our expectations have not been met, or we’ve simple taken our eyes of God.
Here’s the crunch:
A faith crisis cannot be figured out. It has to be “worshipped out”. You can’t reason your way out of a faith crisis, you have to obey your way through. And that can be tricky when faith’s ebb is low.
Yes, the word of God and prayer will certainly be significant in a faith crisis, but that alone won’t move you towards a stronger faith. You need to position yourself, and posture yourself in order to mature. I’ve needed to humbly confess that God’s ways are way above mine and His thoughts are so high, I can’t possibly get near them (Isaiah 55:8-9). I can only understand & mature as I obey my way ahead.
The good news is that many people have had crises of faith and have come out the other side more mature, a lot wiser, and with God’s perspective.
Asaph was such a person. He was a worship leader in King David’s court, and faced a faith crisis at one point. He observed how those who were not God worshippers, seemed to be healthy, wealthy and doing better than he was doing in life, despite following God’s ways to the letter. He was disappointed with God and wondering, “why bother”. Listen to his words about how he was feeling…
“Surely in vain I have kept my heart pure and have washed my hands in innocence. All day long I have been afflicted, and every morning brings new punishments. (Psalm 73:13-14). Not a happy camper! He was having a major faith crisis, but al least had the presence of heart to say this in the very next verse…
If I had spoken out like that, I would have betrayed your children. (v15) In other words, if he had spoken out of that heart – a faith crisis heart – he would have potentially led the people whom God had called him to protect and minister to… and lead in worship, away from serving God.
Then he says this… When I tried to understand all this, it troubled me deeply till I entered the sanctuary of God; then I understood their final destiny.” Psalms 73:13-17 NIV
Asaph is writing this psalm retrospectively. He has come through the crisis with clarity and fresh purpose.
So what does this psalm and Asaph’s experience have to do with us?
Glad you asked. Over many years I’ve worked with and mentored plenty of worship leaders ( and pastors for that matter) going through a faith crisis, and this coloured the words they were leading people with. They lead expecting that everyone else in the room was experiencing what they were experiencing. They were speaking from this position of unsettledness in faith.
When leading, we need to be careful of what we speak because leadership is influence – our faith dilemma will effect those who follow us.
The reason this is most important is this. As worship leaders … and any communicators to people… we need to be aware of our faith situation. If we are struggling with a significant faith crisis, that will come through our communications. If God is distant, that is a part of the human experience and there is always purpose in that, but we dare not speak or lead whilst in the middle of that situation, or what we share lead people to doubt, as it may be an outworking of the flesh (we’re frustrated with God) which is never how we are called to lead. We are to keep in step with the Spirit. (Galatians 5:16,18)
To recalibrate his faith, Asaph did a number of things worth reflection on. (Psalm 73:13-17)
- He admitted his struggle. Confession always needs to lead to repentance.
- He positioned Himself in worship. For him, that was in God’s temple. That’s where he met with God.
- He got God’s perspective about the wicked.
- And then he shared the journey with the people for their growth and maturity.
His trial had become a testimony, and indeed a triumph, but he had to get out to the other side before sharing his story.
Jesus put it like this... “What I tell you in the dark, speak in the daylight; what is whispered in your ear, proclaim from the roofs.” (Matthew 10:27)
Oswald Chambers commented on Jesus’ words with this reflection…
“… pay attention when God puts you into darkness, and keep your mouth closed while you are there. Are you in the dark right now in your circumstances, or in your life with God? If so, then remain quiet. If you open your mouth in the dark, you will speak while in the wrong mood— darkness is the time to listen…. and God will give you a very precious message for someone else once you are back in the light.”
Oswald Chambers
So, if you are in a faith crisis, wait for a revelation before you consider articulation. There’s a lot at stake.
Some beautiful wisdom here. Thanks John! Such a tough one when we’re called on to lead and in the middle of a storm. And so often I’ve found, singing those worship songs (and hearing the sweet sound of the church singing them) brings out the emotion even more. I’ve been rendered a sobbing mess more than once hearing congregations sing ‘In Christ Alone’ or ‘How Deep the Father’s Love’ and had to stop singing and just play! Blessings. Lizzie
Hey John, I agree with Lizzie – you’ve captured some keen insights about sitting in darkness in a crisis of belief. I was drawn to Job as I read your post, and a particular scripture that has instructed and shaped me regarding how to navigate spiritual darkness. It is found in Job 23:9-12…
9 When he is at work in the north, I do not see him; when he turns to the south, I catch no glimpse of him. 10 But he knows the way that I take; when he has tested me, I will come forth as gold. 11 My feet have closely followed his steps; I have kept to his way without turning aside. 12 I have not departed from the commands of his lips; I have treasured the words of his mouth more than my daily bread.
Job 23:9–12 (NIV)
Job cannot perceive God at all in the midst of his life-changing personal crisis. He cries, “I do not see him” and ” I catch no glimpse of him” (v9) even though he was a righteous man who knew God personally. But Job hangs onto some unshakable truths in the midst of his crisis, namely that…
1. God knows Job intimately and completely in his trial and darkness (v10),
2. it was God himself who led him into the darkness to be tested (v10),
3. he will come through the fire and darkness more refined than before (v10),
4. the way forward is to keep obeying God’s word (v11-12),
5. the spiritual realm trumps the physical realm and has a deeper reality (v12).
So the truth about a crisis is that nothing changes about the reality of God or the spiritual principles God has established. What has changed is our perception of these things. When you turn off the lights at night in a room, the objects in the room do not change in the darkness. Rather, our inability to see in the darkness changes our perception of the room, but not the reality of what is actually in the room.
So, the key to moving out of darkness and through a crisis is to speak God’s truth over our circumstances (Job 23:17), obey what we know about God and trust that God’s promises still hold true for us as much in the darkness as in the light.
Thanks John for guiding our journey as worshippers through such a time as this.
Completely true! I’ve been exactly there. Hard to lead from the middle of brokeness, but powerful to lead from a place where God is spoken into that brokeness whatever that looks like. Thanks for you comment.